"what would a holy woman do?

Colleen handed me a book.  the title was, "what would a holy woman do?"  my first thought was, "i have NO idea!"  and just as quickly, "why did i say i would help her with her relief society lesson?!"

She told me to go home, read it and i would know what to do.

She was right.  the book was written by Wendy Watson Nelson.  it's basically a book about a challenge to ask at least once a day for three days, what a holy woman would do in that situation.

After reading the book i knew that this was a timely challenge for me.  i felt that if i did this challenge that i would find the help that i've been needing.

It turns out, i was right.  i did find what i was needing and i was reminded yet again that help is available to me.  i was still surprised at how the challenge went...

DAY 1

I woke up, was reminded almost instantly of the challenges before me.  my to do list was lengthy AND i have 5 kids, one that is 2 1/2 months and nursing.  oh, the weight.  so, i asked, feeling overwhelmed, "what would a holy woman do today?".

the answer was, "she would not run faster than she has strength".  i was amazed as i considered this surprising answer at how much i needed to be reminded of this.  i could go through the day and do what i could do, and not be frantic.  i enjoyed a peace that day that i hadn't felt in a long time.  i enjoyed my kids, talked and played, read, sat and enjoyed an orange and a chat with my sis, none of which were on my to do list; and yet i still accomplished a few other things that were on my list.  it felt good.  really good.

DAY 2

After finishing breakfast, i was about to start on the morning ritual of cleaning the kitchen and i took that quiet moment after the kids had all scrambled away, to ask, "what would a holy woman do right now?".  the answer was, "she would get right to the biggest project that is weighing on her and not put it off."

so i did.  i went right downstairs and started working on the office move.  we've been moving the office upstairs and our daughter downstairs.  at this point it was functional on both accounts and yet, quite a mess.  there were a lot of things to throw out, go through and organize.  i got right to it.  baby was napping and the under school age boys played while i worked.  i was so pleased with what was accomplished.  AND the kitchen was still clean by lunch.

DAY 3

I had been up for 2 hours the night before with baby Jacob and went back to sleep about 5:30.  i woke up at 8:15 quite surprised no one had jumped on my bed yet.  i took this moment of surprise to ask, "ok, what would a holy woman do now?"  the answer was one that saved our morning, "she would not hold others responsible for her actions."

at 8:20, i came out to find Sarah with one rollerblade on and one on it's way to other foot; in her pajamas and with an empty stomach.  normally i would have started barking orders and questions like, "come on, get dressed and hurry!", "you haven't eaten?!", "what are you doing?!", "today is a school day!"  and "GOOD GRIEF!"

today was different because i was trying to do what a holy woman would do.  so, i assessed the situation, talked eye to eye, listened, explained some more, helped, fed and we even prayed.  she was not on time for school, she was there before 9 and our relationship was still intact.   i'd be lying if i said that just because i was trying to do what a holy woman would do that this was easy.  it wasn't.  Sarah was pouty and upset that she couldn't keep playing and it did take a few minutes to get her going.  i would also be lying if i said i wasn't proud of myself. :)

During these days there were also times when after a situation was not handled well on my part, i did also find myself thinking, "a holy woman would definitely not do THAT!".  just about as quickly the Spirit tutored my thoughts and i remembered that a holy woman is holy because she strives to be more holy, not because she is perfect.  she repents, she keeps trying, always trusting that the Lord will forgive and also bless her efforts.

I have continued to ask myself this question and i have also ignored the prompting to do so because i was mad and i didn't want to know!
In my phase of life with these 5 kids, a husband and a life to conquer; i find that i am often overwhelmed and worried that i am not up to the task.  this challenge reminded me that i am not alone in this adventure called life if i don't want to be.   i need to ask for direction and then work to follow it.

i don't always know what a holy woman would do.  the Lord knows and He will help me learn if i continue to ask.  i'm sure that a holy woman would do that, she would ask.